Crowning Joy?

Am I a crowning joy to my husband? Are there times he would be more comfortable on a rooftop, exposed to all kinds of weather rather than dwelling with me?

A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones. (Proverbs 12:4)



It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop [on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather] than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman. (Proverbs 21:9)



It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop than to share a house with a disagreeing, quarrelsome, and scolding woman. (Proverbs 25:24)



I came across these verses yesterday ('came across, as if by accident!' ;-)) and felt the Holy Spirit nudge my heart a little. He has been dealing with me a lot on my tone with my children, which seems to be a constant struggle. But today, I was examining these verses in light of my tone with my husband.



Certainly these verses have many different facets to them, but how they spoke to me had to do with tone. I might rarely outwardly or blatantly nag, scold, quarrel, but does the tone of my voice betray me? It is easy to think, 'well, I don't do those things', when in truth, maybe I do, even innocently, just by the tone of my voice!



"Honey, did you put these socks here?"

or

"You didn't put these socks here did you?"



If I say the second like he is some sort of jerk for putting the socks there, he is apt to feel scolded, belittled, ect.



I want to know if I am doing this! I pray for the Holy Spirit to show me any ungodly tone in my voice. I have asked my husband to tell me if I do this. (gently, and maybe not right at that moment ;-))

• Shaming him


• Nagging him


• quarreling


• faultfinding


• disagreeing


• scolding

How about you?

Have you checked your tone?

What would your husband say if you asked him?

Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.