Thursday, February 12, 2009

Crowning Joy?

Am I a crowning joy to my husband? Are there times he would be more comfortable on a rooftop, exposed to all kinds of weather rather than dwelling with me?

A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones. (Proverbs 12:4)

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop [on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather] than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman. (Proverbs 21:9)

It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop than to share a house with a disagreeing, quarrelsome, and scolding woman. (Proverbs 25:24)

I came across these verses yesterday ('came across, as if by accident!' ;-)) and felt the Holy Spirit nudge my heart a little. He has been dealing with me a lot on my tone with my children, which seems to be a constant struggle. But today, I was examining these verses in light of my tone with my husband.

Certainly these verses have many different facets to them, but how they spoke to me had to do with tone. I might rarely outwardly or blatantly nag, scold, quarrel, but does the tone of my voice betray me? It is easy to think, 'well, I don't do those things', when in truth, maybe I do, even innocently, just by the tone of my voice!

"Honey, did you put these socks here?"


"You didn't put these socks here did you?"

If I say the second like he is some sort of jerk for putting the socks there, he is apt to feel scolded, belittled, ect.

I want to know if I am doing this! I pray for the Holy Spirit to show me any ungodly tone in my voice. I have asked my husband to tell me if I do this. (gently, and maybe not right at that moment ;-))

  • Shaming him

  • Nagging him

  • quarreling

  • faultfinding

  • disagreeing

  • scolding

How about you?

Have you checked your tone?

What would your husband say if you asked him?

Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.


busymomof10 said...

excellent reminder!!

Best Life said...

Ouch! God surely calls us to this challenge because it is what is best for us. You bring up some wonderful things to think about. I also like to remind myself that it's not about him helping me...but me helping him. Lisa~

Amanda Sikes said...

Wow! What a reminder! God has shown me through our change of circumstances lately how much I NEED my husband and how much he loves me. He is willing to shoulder a burden that I can't and to stand against all odds for his family. And how so I respond to him? Am I loving and patient and submissive? Does my attitude and tone portray the place of honor in this home that he deserves? I am praying that God would lead me to see where I need to improve and will guide me daily to strive to do better.
Thanks again for a great post!

busymomof10 said...

I have tagged you to tell 25 things about yourself! I look forward to reading what you share!