I so toyed with the idea of my word for the year being “fearless”. God has been unearthing fear in the deep recesses of my heart. As I recognize more and more of it a holy determination rises up in my spirit.
But alas, my Father has a better plan, which He ALWAYS does! (no matter how much I try to convince Him my plans are pretty good)
He has shown me over the past few weeks where I believe we are ‘going’ this year. It is not so much a fight against fear as it is a filling up of who I am in Him and where my true security lies.
You see, I can fight fear all I want, but until I find my security, my identity, my all in Him and His righteousness it just might be futile battle. Until I believe to my very core that I am righteous, already, because of what Christ did, I will continue to strive and fear and sense a ‘lack’ deep within me.
He has shown me that my fear is rooted in a sense of lack, that something is missing in me, thereby making me ‘feel’ unlovable, unaccepted, unholy, unrighteous, unsafe and unloved.
I am beginning to really grasp that I can ‘think’ I believe certain truths, and ‘say’ I believe certain truths, but how I live my life, how I respond to life shows what I really, truly-ooly believe.
I sense He is taking me on a life changing journey this year. A very exciting journey. It feels like it is the “next” step in this healing process that really took wings in May of 2010, when he radically healed and delivered me from a tremendous amount of bondage. (start at the bottom and work your way up) I have sensed it for weeks and weeks now, something new about to break forth. I feel pregnant (not really pregnant) about to give birth to something beautiful, wonderful and exciting.
The scripture He gave me for the new year is found in Isaiah 43. (the whole chapter, really, but specifically the following)
“ Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert. . .
. . . To give drink to My people, My chosen.
This people I have formed for Myself;
They shall declare My praise.
And my “Word” for the new year?? Righteousness!
Yes, righteousness! I have my bags packed, really just my bible, a pen and a journal, and I am ready to go! I hope to share this journey with you. My “goal”, if you will, is to seek to immerse myself in the scriptures about who I am in Him. Meditate and study righteousness. Read, speak and believe the Truth about His righteousness that is now mine.
Do you have a word or scripture for the new year? I would love to hear it.