Monday, August 10, 2009

Marriage Monday "Your Tips"

For today's installment of Marriage Monday I am asking you all to help out and share a testimony or tip you have about marriage.

I would love to hear your heart on this most wonderful subject, as I am sure others do too. Let's pool the resources of wisdom out there and encourage one another in the heart of Titus 2!

Maybe you have a testimony of a struggle you have found victory over in your marriage.

Maybe you have a tip or two you could share.

Anything on your heart regarding marriage would be a blessing. You can leave your thoughts in the comment section or link to your own blog.

My little tip of the day is:

Try to greet your husband at the end of his work day with a smile, hug and kiss. I realize some days this seems nearly impossible, but try to put your own 'self' on the back burner and cheerfully greet him. Also, it would be really sweet if you could refrain from dumping the burdens of your day on him, at least until he comes in the door. ;-)

I am looking forward to hearing from your heart. Thank you!


Josh and Kelly said...

My goal each day is to kiss my DH decently (not just a peck, but a good, passionate kiss). It helps me remember that we're not just teammates, or partners, but lovers :)

Michelle (She Looketh Well) said...

Good one Kelly! I like that one. There have been seasons in our marriage that I have needed to be reminded that we are indeed not just teammates or partners, but lovers!!

Thanks for sharing!

Emily said...

I love reading your Marraige Monday's, Michelle! I definitely agree with Kelly! I've been married for over 10 years and one thing I think many (even myself sometimes) forget is that their marriage partner and lover is also their best (earthly) friend. I try to be interested in things or learn about the things my husband is interested in as well.

Michelle (She Looketh Well) said...

Thanks for sharing Emily. It's a great tip to try to be interested in what our husbands are interested in. I will occasionally scan the sports page for some little tidbit I can throw out there to my husband so he thinks I am adorable and I care about him. I'll say something like "can you believe 'so and so signed Mr. Blank?" with all seriousness. He loves it! Thanks again

busymomof10 said...

One little tip that has served me well in my marriage and in life in general is to not be easily offended. When my husband says or does something that I could take offense over, I try to tell myself that he probably didn't mean it the way it sounded, that he is probably tired and frustrated after a hard day at work and is really "spanking the boss" (as Gregg Harris used to say), etc. Remembering that part of love is assuming the best of someone, I just assume he didn't mean to hurt or offend me by his comment. By refraining from overacting, and refusing to be offended (most of the time!), it diffuses many potential hurts or disagreements and with experience, I have learned to let hurtful comments from others, such as my MIL!, to just roll off my back. Life is to short to dwell on these things anyway.

Thanks for your wonderful series!

Jena said...

When I read the first part of the blog (the part about what you wanted us to do) I knew exactly what I was going to say, then I read your tip and you pretty much said it.

I look at how my children greet my husband every time they see him, they run and scream and can't hug him tight enough, can't kiss him fast enough (even if he had to scold them before he left for work - kids forget)and it always puts a smile on his face. I thought to myself one day, why don't I do that? So now I do. I race the kids (sometimes I let them win) to see who gets to him first. I hug and kiss him, I smile at him and ask him about his day (even if we had words that morining before he left - ESPECIALLY if we had words that morning before he left for work).

Have you heard the phrase, "Fake it until you make it!"? I do that sometimes. If I genuinely don't feel preppy or upbeat when hubs gets home, I fake it. I pretend to be in a better mood than I actually am - and surprise, I usually get in a better mood before I even realize it. (Now don't get me wrong. I don't do this 100% of the time - that's my goal, but I am just a woman).

Valencia said...

I always try to show respect to my husband as the head of our home as ordained by Christ. This is one that takes work, but when done, he feels like the king he truly is. And in return he treats me like the queen I am.

Michelle (She Looketh Well) said...

Elizabeth, that is such a good one and one that is sooooo hard for me. This man treats me wonderfully 99.9999% of the time, why in the world do I let one little offense bring me down?! I am going to work on this one. I love the thought that 'love believes the best'.

Jen, love the 'fake it till you make it' I think this just has to be sometimes! I can have victory over my emotions and usually faking a good mood produces a good mood.

Valencia, you are so right on. When we treat them like the kings they are in our lives, it's funny how we get treated like queens.

Thank you all for sharing!

Jason and Lisa Jones said...

Great post and comments. Really enjoyed going back and reading your past ones! Made me think a lot. :)

Bernice said...

My tip...

NEVER speak negatively about your spouce to another person. It not only makes him look bad but yourself also. Like, why did you even marry him if he is this bad.

Also, it makes us feel even more negatively against him when we talk that way. If you can't say anything good, don't say anything!

Michelle (She Looketh Well) said...

Bernice, this is a great one too! I so try to live by this.

Amanda Sikes said...

One thing that I have tried to implement in my life is to go out of my way to show respect to my husband. I do this especially while in public and around extended family. I have found that when I answer him with a "Yes, Sir" or rise to refill his drink before he asks it makes him feel good. I can see it in his face that he is proud of his family and of being the head of it as God intended. It is so very clear to me that it means the world to him when I respect his position and I am not afraid to show it.

Queen Diva said...

Thank you so much for this post, Michelle! The Lord has been working on me in so many ways these past few months in regards to my hubby and how I treat/respect him. You can find my tips, that I'm definitely still working on, on my blog. Here's the link. :)

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

I hope I can be blunt here. What means the most to my husband is making sure his sexual needs are being met, often!

After reading some of these other posts, I know I need to work on greeting him like the kids greet him. I don't know why, but I feel sillying doing that. I need to get over it and make him feel like our king when he gets home.

Great post topic!

Michelle (She Looketh Well) said...

Cheesemakin' Mamma, you most certainly can be blunt here! I think this one is sooooo important and often overlooked. I believe we go through different seasons in this area, but I think as wives we would be wise to keep attentive to this need.

We find it is so important to talk about it even during a more difficult season. we still play and have fun during these times. It is easy, I find, to get wrapped up in my needs or health issues that I lose sight of him. Once again 'self' rears her ugly head. It does help to have an incredibly understanding and patient husband. He reminds me often "it's worth the wait" ;-)

thanks for sharing about this important topic

WesternWoodburner said...

I am not married so I can't ofer tips, however I will try to keep the good advice in mind if the Lord has in mind for me to marry. :-)