Monday, July 27, 2009

Marriage Monday "Controlling Our Thoughts"

We can choose what we think about. God's word tells us to take out thoughts captive in 2 Corinthians 10. In Philippians, Paul encourages us, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."

While we might not be able to always choose what thoughts pop into our minds, we can choose what to do with them!

Let's look at different types of thoughts that find their way into our minds and see what we can do to turn them around.

Thoughts about his weaknesses:

Let's face it, as much as we love our husbands, they do have a few (or many) weaknesses. (Let's not forget we do too;-) If we allow ourselves to meditate on all their weaknesses, I believe they will only be magnified in our minds. The second you find yourself zeroing in on his faults, stop right there and choose to focus on his strengths. Make a list of his strengths, if you have to, and pull it out when needed.

Complaining thoughts:

These types of thoughts seem to naturally follow the previous type because usually it is their weaknesses we are complaining about. As soon as you realize you are complaining in your head about him, stop it immediately! Take those sinful thoughts captive and replace it with thankful thoughts. If we just took half a second, took our eyes off of ourselves, we could come up with a multitude of things to be thankful for.

Comparing thoughts:

Never, ever do it! Don't allow it for one second. It only sows a seed of discontent! Take hold of those thoughts and bring them into submission. Praise God for the man He has given you!

Negative thoughts:

Once you begin to look for these, they are easy to spot. They just make you feel all yucky, your shoulders start to slump, your face gets a bit grumpy looking and your heart feels heavy. Let me just say again, we can choose what we think about. Whatever that negative thought is, find a positive one to replace it with.

It is amazing to me how my mind can actually determine what kind of day I am going to have, or what kind of attitude I have. When I find myself having a bad day, mad at my husband or children, discouraged or in despair for that matter, I can pretty much trace it back to that wonderful thing called my mind! We are not victims, held hostage by our thoughts, we can choose! I am not saying it is easy, but we can have victory in this area. At times, I have had to grab my head and out loud tell it what to think!

Grab your bible, make lists of things about your husband you are thankful for, write out your husband's strengths, do whatever it takes, do not let your thoughts erode away at your marriage.

"A wise woman builds her house, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands."

Lord Jesus, reveal to us where we foolishly entertain wrong thoughts about our husbands. Give us wisdom to replace those wrong thoughts with Godly, edifying thoughts.


angela said...

This is so awesome... I love my husband so much and I try always to practice these truths. BUT, the other day I was around someone and He was doing something my husband doesn't do and I had the thought "Wow, look at him I bet his wife never has to complain about that..." I was just about to continue on with that thought and the Holy Spirit stopped my thoughts right there and told me like Cain "sin is crouching at your door." I was so mortified and I just saw what couldv'e happened if I had continued on with that. I had to repent and ask for forgiveness and I asked God to help me to concentrate on the wonderful strengths that my husband does have. And remember the grass is only greener in someone elses yard because we can't see the fertilizer. Thank you for these truths and I'm sorry for this long reply but I needed to share!!!

hip chick said...

I have been thinking on the same subject lately. We are in control of how we react to our thoughts. We con choose what to focus on and what to push aside. I find that when I keep my focus on God and my family and how very fortunate I am to have such a loving and attentive husband my days are much more fulfilling.

YooperSnowflake said...

Thank you!

Valencia said...

What a heartfelt post. I have been putting so much effort in submitting to my hubs lately and it really has made a big difference in our marriage. I hope you get a chance to stop by my one year blog party this week.

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

Thank you for this post. I had a really bad day yesterday (I broke down on the freeway in 100 degree heat with no shade. I had my four month old and 10 year old with me and I was very scared and grumpy. I thought of many blessings, but I did dwell on the negative too much. I hope I do better next time I am tested.

I love your blog! it is very encouraging.

Tina said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you! What a wonderful reminder. Yesterday I wish I had read this - I desperately needed the godly reminder. God is so good to constantly forgive us. His mercies are new every morning. Praise Him! He used your post to bless me. Thanks so much.

Anonymous said...

Thank you...needed to read this. Again. I'll keep trying...

Word verification: LAHEXTR. n. Laughter interrupted by a hiccup. ;-)