I have sensed the Lord’s voice several times in my heart lately. I think I have heard Him encouraging me to look around and see. See that, just maybe, this life I am living IS the beautiful, although messy, life I have always dreamed of.
I have spent so long trying to be a certain way. Be a certain type of mama, wife and home maker. Not sure where I got my pictures of what that should really look like, but always striving to be something that I am not right now.
I have been slowly seeing that I am who He created me to be and I actually like me! As I have stopped trying to “BE” and accepted who I am, life has gotten a lot more enjoyable.
The enemy can blind us into chasing after this ‘perfection’ that we don’t enjoy right where we are right now. I asked Brian a couple of weeks ago, ‘what if I just stopped ‘looking’ for something else and just enjoyed what I had?’ Seems like a no-brainer, I know. But think about it.
What if you stopped thinking about all the flaws and weaknesses in yourself and just started thanking God for the strengths that you do have?
What about not looking at all the areas in your parenting that are amiss and just trust God to work those out. You might actually start enjoying being a mama again instead of always feeling like you are ‘such a bad mama’.
What if you stopped looking at all the areas your husband doesn’t measure up to the other men at church, or the men who give the homeschool conference teachings, and just started enjoying him as he is?
I have been stopped in my tracks lately as I look around here. A friend stopped over the other day and saw my husband working on a piece of furniture, me working along side him. The little children were all running around outside, in the sunshine, chasing chickens back into the coop. The older ones were in the house doing school. I paused, oh.my.word. This is exactly what I have dreamt of.
I don’t know if I am explaining it well, but what if what we have is really what we have always wanted?? If we could take off the perfection glasses and the critical spirit and begin to be thankful for right where we are we might find we are pretty blessed.