Reading in the Word yesterday and coming across the words, ‘let me not be ashamed’ brought back a flood of memories.
I remember praying, pleading, believing, h.o.p.i.n.g. that Your Word was true and that You would indeed contend with those who contend with us and that You would not let us ‘be ashamed’, for we put our trust—our weak and faltering trust in You.
Oh, Father, how I remember the years, the pain, the sorrow. The times of clinging, barely, to Your faithfulness. I remember where faltering faith often times gave way to weak and anemic hope. I would go from, ‘Your Word is true!’ to ‘Your Word is true . . . right? Please let it be true.’
I remember days that turned into years of wondering if the fiery trials would ever end. Would sadness and grief and the begging kind of hope be my reality forever? Would it always be normal to expect a ‘sucker punch’ at every corner? Would I ever wake up and NOT wince, wondering what was coming today? Would there be a day when I would actually “see” the goodness of the Lord and begin to experience favor and joy and hope and laughter. Would I ever wake up expecting Your favor on my day, or would it always be a weak hope?
I remember well those years, and I see how You held me even when I felt like I was free-falling. I remember each and every one of those feelings and the memories cause me to just shake my head and marvel at how you HEAL and DELIVER and RESTORE and REBUILD. I laugh when I think of how far YOU have brought us and that every single word You have spoken is TRUE and has come true and is coming true.
Lord, let me never doubt Your faithfulness. Let me always know that no matter how horribly dark it gets YOU are faithful and Your Word is true!
I don’t know where you are right now or how deep the valley may be or how very dark your days are, but I am pleading with you to know that He is faithful. He is holding you. He will restore. All the paths of the Lord are mercy. It might not seem like it, but they are.
You are going to make it through, THROUGH, this valley!!